whats the difference between a dead body and a car with doors that open in a diagnal manner one was never alive to begin with

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How do you get a black man down from a tree? Cut the rope!

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I like to rape children, then kill them, eat them and defecate them into a toilet

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what is the difference between a dead baby in a bag and a dead baby hung in the yard....the dead baby hung in the yard was shot down off the cross after being rmr'd

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You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

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What's sad about a guy jumping off a cliff? The cliff.

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One walrus says to the other, "Why are you shaking like that?" The other walrus says, " I've been addicted to ectasy for three years. It's ruining my life."

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Roses are red, Violets are glorious, Don't try to surprise Oscar Pistorius.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms... Why couldn't sally get up? She had no legs Why did no one help sally? Because she has no friends.

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What did Han Solo say to Chewy before they got in the Millennium Falcon? Chewy, get in the ship.

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So an African, Asian, and White man walk into a bar, what do they all have in common? Believe it or not, they all liked cantaloupe.

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What did the hedgehog say to the beaver? Nothing, they can't talk.

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Why did little Jimmy fall off his bike? Because I threw a fridge at him.

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What's worse than a bug in your soup? Getting shot in the stomach.

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Two fuses wearing bombs for hats were sitting on a bench with their frayed feet dangling on the ground. A match was walking along and tripped, hitting it's head on the ground and bursting into flame. Luckily the fuses had finished lunch by that time and gone back to work. Unluckily for the match it died from burns to 80 percent of it's body.

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What's a foot long and slippery? A slipper.

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A man once went duck pin bowling, 5 years later he died of leukemia.

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What did David's mom give him for his birthday? Nothing he hasn't seen her in eight years.

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Why did Larry fall off his bike? He was hit in the head with a brick...

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You know what's funny? You got AIDs

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Why did the baby duck cry? Because his family just got ran over by a truck

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There is a high speed pursuit when suddenly the suspect's car skids out of control and crashes into a field. Two cows witness the commotion, when one turns round to the other and says "Moo"

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Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... The FedEx man leaves, realizing that no one was home, and continues on with his job.

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Why did Rihanna sing "to the left, to the left"? Because people usually sing in songs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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