Why is Suzie at the bottom of the cliff? Because I pushed her. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have AIDS, now so do you.

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Q: What do you call a innocent black man that was shot 403 times by the cops when they asked for his ID and somehow assumed he was gonna reach for a gun? A: Deceased Texan.

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Question to make it sound like a racist joke? Politically correct answer that should not offend anyone.

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Why did the boy fail the test? He had down syndrome.

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(Played Basketball for 15 years) I TOLD YOU I'D QUIT WHEN LeBron Gets A RING

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what did the guy do at the funeral? cry because his wife died

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have the Cadillac, Get the Guns

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What's harder than nailing a dead baby on a tree? My dick while doing it.

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Why was the boy eating lunch by himself at school? Because his only friend was hit by a train.

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Please ignore this statement.

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Brother : you see this hand Sister : yes Brother : if you dont leave ill slap you with it Sister : no you wont !SLAP!!!!

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a fat kid walked up to me today at school and claimed he could do more pull ups than i. i found this very funny because i have known this boy since i was two months old, and he witnessed the day where i lost both of my arms to cancer.

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What can't catch or throw? A Quadriplegic

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Roses are red,Violets are blue, Who the hell are you,Get the hell away

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A blonde walks into a bar. She enjoys a refreshing, cold beverage with friends before returning home to sleep ahead of another day of hard work as a scientist.

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A redhead and a blonde both go out to smoke a cigarette. They are both at risk of lung cancer.

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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What is furry, red, and flat? Road kill.

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A black man walks into a KFC. He buys a bucket of chicken, then distributes it to several homeless men he supports off of his meager income because he knows their situations are much worse than his.

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Q:Why did Santa, the tooth fairy, and a rich man jump out of a plane? A: On Christmas Eve, a rich man was skydiving and lost his tooth as he plummeted towards the beautiful plateau.

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Why didn't the black kid get anything for Christmas? His family was Jewish.

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How do you drown a blonde? Force her head underwater until she can no longer breathe, thus shutting down her brain and killing her.

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It's good to be a scientist and great to be a biologist. However, it is never okay to be a scientologist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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