How many electricians does it take to screw on a light bulb? 1

knock knock who's there? the paperboy the paperboy who? i lied, i'm a serial rapist, you should have looked through the peephole

Why couldn't the T-Rex clap his hands? He was dead.

What does the Bill in Bill Clinton stand for? Bilious.

Q. What do you get when you mix eggs, mashed potatoes and salt? A. A pretty good batter for mashed potato pancakes.

Asian women drivers...

What's worse than having embaracing parents? A: they are of the same sex

Q. How many men did it take to build a wall? A. None, the wall is already built.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

A black woman was filling out forms at the welfare office. Under "Number of children," she wrote "10," and where it said "List names of children," she wrote "Leroy." When she handed in the form, the woman behind the desk pointed out: "Now here where it says "List names of children," you're supposed to write the names of each one of your children." "Dey all named Leroy," said the black woman. "That's very unusual. When you call them, how do they know which one you want?" asked the welfare worker. The Black woman said, "Oh, den I uses the middle names."

When you see birds flying in a V why is one side of the V always longer than the other? There are more birds on that side

How does it change many dyslexics to take a lightbulb

As we had been trying for some months now, I called my wife to ask her the result of her pregnancy test. A stranger answered and promptly told me she was killed in a car crash.

Why did the chicken cross the road I don't know

knock knock Goodbye

What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

A Muslim walks into a public library. 32 people killed in the explosion.

How do you get a baby to stop crying? Run it over with a lawn mower!

What is the worst thing to say to a dying person? After you die I'm going to defile your corpse, nan.

wheres an unexpected place to find sand? a human pancreas.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

why did the chicken cross the road? because he wanted to!

A Hispanic walks into an alleyway and sees two of his rich friends. He desperately needs money and only has enough time to shoot one of them because he sees the police following him. He decides which one to shoot... Wait, if he has enough time to think about this shouldn't he just shoot both of them?

Roses are red Violets are blue Most rhymes rhyme But this one doesnt

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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