Why did the chicken cross the road? It couldn't handle the stress and pressure of being a duck so it committed suicide by crossing a road and therefor being run over by a car.

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1: Knock Knock? 2: Who's There? *runs*

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Whats worse then a worm in your apple This joke

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What is life? Paul.

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Why did the koala fall of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the other koala fall off the tree? It was stapled to the first koala.

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a fridge halfway through walking.

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"Sticks and stones" the man said and shat on three different complex turtles

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What's the one game that black people are good at? Flashlight tag.

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What does Santa give to a naughty child who wants coal for Christmas? Nothing, Santa doesn't exist.

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What do you say to the man break dancing?? You don't, call an ambulance he is having an epileptic fit.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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A deaf man walks into a bar. Someone yells, "FIRE!" and everyone evacuates. The deaf man does not hear him and dies horribly.

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Who always participates in "No shave November"? The homeless.

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12 in general

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Knock knock. Who's there? Big Brother. Big Brother who? That's right. ALL are who, Akbar!

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Timmy's mom is an alcoholic. His dog is asleep in the backyard. Timmy asks his mother, "Why is our dog sleeping?" His mother replies, "It's not sleeping, its dead."

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12345678910111213141516171819whatcomesnext

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What do you get when you cross a lion and a tiger? A Ligor.

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Q: 1 out of every 44 presidents can dunk, who is it? A: How the hell am i suppost to know

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Why can't a T-rex clap its hands? It's extinct.

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Why don't Vikings read the New York Times? Because they all died centuries ago. And none of them live in New York.

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How do you make a 5 year old cry? Kill their parents.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Names.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops