your mumma so fat when she stepped on the scales it said her phone number

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How many holes can you poke in my chest, When my chest is by far the best If you believe you can stab Then then grab a knife...that you can grab Skewer my breast Which lies on the best chest And you will discover A man under your covers Yes, keep on pokin' Poke my chest with the knife you are strokin' And then swallow a chode because you are stupid.

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What do you call a bunch of black people buried up to their hair? Afro turf

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A circus clown riding the cutest miniture Shetland pony both fall over a cliff and die.

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Why can't so many guys get it up? Because erectile dysfunction affects 30 million men nationwide.

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Why did the woman go out of the kitchen? She did not because she had a curse put on by a man off the streets of Greek row a Yale that said u may never leave the closest kitchen near this very spot, and it turns out that the closest kitchen was in a frat house across the street so now she is stuck in the kitchen making sandwiches for all the frat bros at this Yale frat house, So basically she was in her place

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What did the alphabetical soup spell for little Bobby? U gOt SUzie prEgnant ....... aGaiN

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How do you confuse a Mexican? Stand in the middle of a crosswalk while shouting "Cthulu will rise!" whilst looking at the sky and playing "Everybody Have Fun Tonight" by Wang Chung. Works every time.

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Why did the mexican immigrant have no friends? He lacked social skills and was unfamiliar with American mannerism's.

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have u been drinking cannabel soup because you........ahhhhh!!!!! why are you trying to eat me!

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When Zeddie LIttle takes an Unflattering picture, millions of Internet people ask him why he looks Wierd in it. He says, "well, I was having a really tough day that day- my grandpa had just died- and I didn't feel like caring about what I looked like." Either way, he essentially fades into the darkness as the new fad takes over.

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Knock Knock Whos There? I'p I'p who? HAHAHAHA

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How do you save a drowning Asian teenage boy? You get him out of the water.

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whats the difference between a jew and a boy scout? - The boy scout comes home from camp.

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Why did the boy fart on his sister? Because he was sitting on her, and happened to pass gas.

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A guy walks into a bar. The second guy ducks.

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What do a Nazi and a Democrat have in common? They are both members of a highly supported political faction.

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Three penguins sitting in a tub. The first penguin says to the third penguin, "Hey would you pass the soap?" The penguin in the middle says, "What do you think I am a typewriter?"

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What did the one midget say to the other midget? We r both small

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How many different ways can you kill a cat? 27, unless you live in Russia then it's 28

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What is red and smells like blue paint? Read paint.

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a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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Why was six afraid of seven? Six wasn't. He listens in on women's self defense classes and can deliver a kick to the crotch so hard that it will create for you a new vagina.

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How do you get your dog to give you a blow job? You have to force him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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