What's a green tasty vegetable? None, they're vegetables.

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Why won't Santa be delivering presents this year? Because he can't be bothered.

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Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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What did the White guy say to the balck guy? "How are you?"

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Its babies were being mauled by a cat.

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What do you a call a black man in a two piece suit? A respectable citizen, racial profiling is ignorant.

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A woman walked into a college.....which wasn't suprising because she never learned to read

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Why did the man have no head? It was blown off in Iraq 2 and days ago

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guest who else is a ugly bitch my mom

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A Jew walked into a bar and his cat died of aids

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A man walks into a bar And compliments the bartender for his great service

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What happens when you put four drunk clowns and eight sober clowns inside of a clown car? Nothing, because the clowns realized that it's dangerous to operate a vehicle while under the influence of alcohol and decides to call a taxi instead.

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-Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? -She had no arms. -Knock, knock. Who's there? -Not Sally.

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what did one paper football say to the other? did you get flicked off too.

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Když si to Nikolas ,dejme tomu že Bihary, you know nuseng.. hahahahaha

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What do democrats and fire have in common? They both do damage

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It's that time of the month again... ...to cut my toenails.

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My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

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Why are the dinosaurs extinct? A meteor hit the Yucatan Peninsula and caused a blast that covered the earth and killed them all.

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What did the asian kid do before he got a blood test? He studied.

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What is red and fluffy?... Your teddy bear covered in blood...

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asking someone to check ur broken wing mirror to fall into that persons arms by accident is not a good idea

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There are two types of people in the world: 1. people who can extrapolate from incomplete data And I have two wonderful pieces of advice: 1. Never tell anyone everything you know

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yo mommas so fat she heard it was chilly out so she ran inside and got a bowl

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops