Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad at making jokes And your a jew

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're adopted.

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Why was the Mexican in the back of a pick up truck? There were not any available seats.

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what do you call a dead man rolling down a hill on fire, being shot in the head, and strapped to a bomb Dead

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What do you call a black priest? Holy shit.

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Why did the Jew pick up the quarter on the sidewalk? Because he was going to buy a candy bar and was short 25 cents.

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when life knocks you down you don't do anything because life is a mental concept that does not have the ability to knock you down since it doesn't have a physical bodie

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whats worse than four babies in a box? one baby in four boxes

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How do you stop the mailman from performing his daily routes? You fill his house with blood thirsty bobcats

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Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.

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What do you call a black man with a peg leg? Disabled

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A man was complaining about not getting enough sleep. He was then raped.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was suicidal.

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A gay man walks into a pregnant woman

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Man 1: Do you want to hear a joke? Man 2: Sure. Man 1: Okay.

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why did the chicken cross the road? who cares?

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A Irish leaves and bump in to a really tall the Irish sorry boss

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Whats the difference between wayne rooney and shrek? Well, one, shrek is fictional. Two if he was fictional,he is green. Wayne rooney is not green. Three wayne rooney plays for a football team, surely shrek has no idea what football is. The list goes on.

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What do polar bears have that no other animal has? Polar bear babies.

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How many pastry chefs does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. It's a fairly simple job.

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A white man a black man a french man and a mexican are on a sinking ship. The French man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of begets over board. The Black man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of red hot cheetos overboard The Mexican man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of Tacos over board. And then the White man says "we have too many of these" and throws the Mexican man overboard

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Your momma is so fat she has an increased risk or cardiac arrest due to obesity. I ridicule her based on the theory that her morbid obesity is due to the fact that she has a diet consisting of large amounts of calories and high fat content and/or she is known to be very sedentary and does not partake in physical exercise. However, if this increase in body fat content is due to genetics I retract my previous statement and wish only the best for her, also, you might want to lower your calorie intake and visit your local gym, lest you succumb to morbid obesity, much like your mother.

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What did the rapist say to the child? Contrary to popular belief, I am just a kind old man that likes to hand out sweets to disadvantaged young children. I only got dubbed a rapist when a child crawled into the back of my van as I drove off; the fact that his abusive father was the one who raped him is not my fault.

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What happened when the Mexican lays his head on a pillow? He falls asleep

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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