What did the orphan boy get for Christmas? Cancer. What did he get for his birthday? He didn't make it that far...

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What did the blind girl say? Its dark in here.

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Why did the welshman cross the road? To violently hump sheep.

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What did the oak tree say to the pine tree? Nothing tress dont speak regardless of the kind.

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Why did The Chicken cross The Road? The Chicken was a new drug dealer to town and he did a deal with The Road , the town's existing drug dealer (they used these nicknames to hide their identities), but then back stabbed him to try and take the whole area for himself. Money and Power, as always.

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if i get 1,000 likes ill kill your hole family

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A cyclist looses control in a race. How does he stop? Run into the spectators on the side of the road.

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Justin Bieber

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Jack wasn't nimble. Jack wasn't quick. Jack sat on the candle and burned his corduroys.

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what's the worst part about owning a prius? telling your parents you're gay

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a serial-rapist with links to the Black Dragon triad. Yee.

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"Do you like pie?" "No." "Do you like blueberries?" "No." "I have something you won't like." "Is it a blueberry pie?" "No, I shagged your wife last night".

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What's faker than Nicki Minaj's tits? Women rights.

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I can prove I'm a psychic - this post is going to receive a lot of dislikes.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? [no one] After that day, Dave moves out of the house assuming that a ghost knocked on his door.

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Was the last joke funny? Because this one isn't.

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How do you stop a black man from committing a crime? You throw him a basket ball.

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Q: A Mexican and a Jew are at a race. Who get hit first? A: None of them because they're from a different religion.

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how many couples does it take to screw in a light bulb. 1 the wife to go buy the light bulb and the husbend to put it in.

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did you hear about the circus fire? it was tragic and hundreds of people were killed.

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whats the difference between a guitar and a fish? A guitar is an instrument used to produce noise and a fish is a living orgnism native to lakes and oceans

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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Knock knock. Who's there?

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A man walks into a bar and see's a 12 inch pianoist. He walks to the bar tendar and asks "Where'd you get it" The bar tendar says we have a genie in the back. So the man walks back the and wishes for 12 million BUCKS , The genie gives him 12 million DUCKS, The man walks back out and said " I asked for 12 million BUCKS not 12 million DUCKS and the bar tendar says do you really think i asked for a 12 inch pianoist?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops