a man rides on his horse to rohde island and back. he rode on Friday and returned on Friday. damn, that's one fat horse

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Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

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Don't chop the dinosaur daddy! OK.

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On a scale of 1 to 10, how high are you? Very.

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What did the little Jew boy get for Christmas? nothing he is a Jew, he doesn't celebrate Christmas.

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Chuck Norris can get a nuke in Black Ops.

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Three Jew begin to walk down the street, they then pursue walking and purchase many goodies from vendors.

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A duck walks into a bar- nope, just chuck testa...

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Q: What's worse than being stung by a bee A: The Rwandan Genocide

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Nero, I am happy to hear from you again, but it kinda sounds like you are going to get yourself killed or something. Is there something else I can do? If that asshole is suffering, kill him after he is done doing it, I am done with that piece of shit. Honestly, what is going on Nero? You are not going to suicide or something are you? Please respond, right away, or I wont call your wife.

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What did the straw say to the other straw? We are both straws just kidding they cant talk

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What's Pi times the square root of a panda's earlobe? Panda's do not have earlobes... thus the answer is inexplicable.

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Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

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Why do so many people enjoy these jokes. They are funny

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Which ballet do pigs like best? Pigs don't understand ballet, but they probably like the ones with audience participation, as they are friendly animals and enjoy interacting with humans.

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Stephen Hawking is so paranoid, always looking over his shoulder.

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What did the nazi say to the jew? Nothing, he shot 'em

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Why are bannanas bendy? Because unlike cucumbers bannas are not grown in a tube and are left to grow at their own pace.

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Your mom is so ugly- Wait, hold on. How are you born?

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Where do cows go to have fun? Cows don't have a concept of fun as such, but they would probably go to a large, sunny field full of lush, green grass with a bubbling river and plenty of shade.

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What wuld u do for a klondike bar? Nothing taste like shit.

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A man looks both ways before crossing the street. He gets hit by an airplane.

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A banana walks into a bar many people leave considering bananas certainly don't walk. many people are wondering if they are dreaming

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Every time I walk across the street I do the Hitler march and raise my arm straight out to salute him, if I feel like holding up traffic, I take smaller steps

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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