A baby seal walks into a club.

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what do you get if you cross a motorway with a wheel barrow? Arrested as a wheelbarrow is not a motorised vehicle, or even a vehicle at all and therefore it is an offence to cross the motorway with it, actually it is probably an offence to cross a motorway with anything now that I come to think of it

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Why did Bob the Builder die? He had cancer.

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What did the talking muffin say to the other talking muffin? Ah! A talking muffin!

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What happened to the boy who stalked the pretty girl? His father raped him and he died in a house fire induced by his overwhelmingly sick love for the taliban

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Not yours.

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Whats worse than a creep? ..... Paul sweeney!

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Teacher- Pick the odd one out- Man, whale, bat, squirrel, frog Student- Whale. All others are found in Nebraska

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being the worm.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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what did the dog say to the cat nothing because dogs can`t talk and if they could talk the cat wouldn`t understand him because cats can`t talk

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What do you call a girl who has recently been raped? Dead.

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Why did the black man have no toes? Because during his climb of Everest, he got frostbite and they had to be amputated.

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The only time when white and black are together When I've just taken a shit! ?ttis

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Knock-Knock Who's there? The UPS guy dumb ass

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im gonna poop my pants. mom said to wipe afterwards i am a teletubby

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What did the little kid say to the stranger? Nothing. He was taught not to talk to strangers.

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Guess what? Chickenbuttt hahahah! lolomfg

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josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

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What do you call a boy with one arm one leg and an eye patch? Names

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what did Tim do when he got married? He kissed the bride Mecheoo LOVES ASS

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Why did the boy have pink skin at night? Because he did not put on a sufficient amount of sunscreen that morning. This is also known as sunburn.

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What is long, hard, and full of seamen? a school bus, if you consider children to be seamen

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This is my favorite antijoke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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