why didn't sue come to her son's baseball game? because he doesn't play baseball, he lost his arms in a horrible plane crash. besides, sue died in that accident anyway.

How did the baby survive the car accident? He didn't. He was killed on impact.

A man walks into a bar. Three hours later, ambulances arrived, because the man was knocked out. The man who saved was known as a hero, and was awarded a medal for his good deed.

Q: What's worse than your parents dying in a car crash? A: You were in the backseat and saw your mother plead your father to slit her throat witht he broken glass because her legs were brushed and a windshield wiper was shoved in her kidney. As you stared on in pure horror, your father did as she asked with much contemplation. An ambulance arrives moments later. In the hospital, you tell your dad that you hate him for killing mom. You run away and he dies overnight due to heart failure. Yo suffered paralysis and now and are confined to a wheelchair for the rest of your natural life and are sent away to a born-again foster care home where you are never adopted.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

Why was johnny so good at reading? Because he had 3. Toes

What is worst than Justin Bieber new album? Being a jew during the holocaust or aids.

Whats really down a black hole? I don't know...The last person to go down one never came back because he died of AIDS.

69...you know how awkward this is now...

How much does a dead battery cost? Nothing, it's free of charge.

Why couldn't the boy watch the DVD about pirates? Because his mother did not understand the importance of putting the disc back in it's case after use, and as a result, has become too damaged for the DVD Player to play.

Why did the boy dig a hole in the football field? He was blind and his parents were being quite irresponsible....However someone should probably fill in that hole, as that could be a hazard during a football game.

How do you know when you're on the wrong side of the tracks? You don't. (Wyndellberg)

what's round, hairy, has eight legs- but isn't a spider? A spider.

Q. What does FIAT stand for? A. Frenzied Italian At Traffic-lights.

What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? Get on the ship.

Why did the man with no arms or legs fall out of the tree? Because he got shot.

If Chuck Norris were to be hit by a train he would die

Robin Williams walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? To which Robin Williams replies, "Because I'm going to kill myself."

Why couldn't the bunny hop? Because it lost both it's legs

What's worse than getting a paper cut? Getting shot in the face.

What do you call a black priest? Holy shit.

A bald man walks out a bar crying Prostate cancer

Error 37.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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