How do you know if an elephants been in your fridge? It's completely destroyed.

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whats funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff cathcing him at the bottom with a pitch fork

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Whats funny about a guy with no legs? I bought him a wheelchair.

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Why did the blonde fail her science test? Because she spent all day at the hair salon getting her hair died from brown to blonde when she should have spent the time productively studying.

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why did little suzy fall off the swing? she was stabbed by a drugaddict

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Donald Trump

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What's green and has wheels? grass... i lied about the wheels

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What did the baby do when it crossed the rode? It didn't get across it got hit by a car.

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Why would Maria not have sex with Liam? Because she is Danish and doesn't shave and therefore is self-conscious

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How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

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how do women get from the kitchen to the bedroom? they walk there.

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What happened when the princess kissed a frog. Warts, all over her lips

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What tastes worse than dog shit? White dog shit.

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what do you get when you you put a knife in a head? a dead body

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Why was the Saudi Arabian terrorist flying a plane in America? He was going to visit some family on a ranch in Kansas.

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What do you call a black man wearing tights? Rick

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

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Whats the difference between a black guy at the beach, and a black guy at the zoo? One is at the beach, and one is at the zoo.

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chirs

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What did the paraplegic say when he walked? Nothing, paraplegics can't walk.

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Why did the father and his son drop their cola? Because a meteor hit and killed all life on Planet Earth.

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Gay people: "Quit calling Justin Bieber gay, we don't want him either."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops