A young couple just gave birth to their first child and the doctor says, I’ve good some good news and some bad news, what do you want first? Give us the bad news first, the parents reply. Your baby has red hair, says the doctor. Well whats the good news, ask the parents. It’s dead.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Barack Obama. Ok, come on in Mr. President!

Why did two girls need one cup? they didnt feel like washing an extra dish to drink their coca cola

What's red and green And moves at 300mph A frog in a blender

your momma's so fat that she weighs a lot

knock knock? who's there Dave Come on in!!!!!

What is Arnold Schwarzenegger's favorite lollipop? Choppa Chups.

I would have made you laugh, but that is not the point is it? Moral: What do you expect from the 4th most pointless invention?

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

What's white and can't climb a tree? A Refrigerator

WHERE WAS THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENTENTS AT THE BOTTEM!!!

How many illegal immigrants does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Illegal immigrants don't use lights, they'd get caught. Dumbass.

theres no I in Intelligence a.w. j.p.

Why is the deer afraid of the hunter? Because he doesn't want to get shot.

Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "My face isn't long relative to the others of my species, it is actually quite normal."

There once was a girl who took away my source of entertainment. Her name was Nicole.

What's red and checkered and tells you to turn your music down? Michael

Why couldn't John go to the store for his mother? He had no legs...

My Japanese girlfriend dumped me today...Oh well, theres plenty more in the sea

Q: Why do black people buy so many pairs of shoes? A: Because when they outgrow there old pair they need new shoes.

We're sorry, but something went wrong. We've been notified about this issue and we'll take a look at it shortly.

Q: How does 5 gay people walk together? A: In One Direction.

What do you call a Mexican who steals cars? John Doe, until he's been identified.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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