Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his parents died.

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Situation. A man trying to find meaning in his life. Question. Why are desieses not colorful, and tasty. Answer. Adolf Hitler and his ice cream songs that he sings on sunday mornings during brunches.

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How many spots does a giraffe have? Depends on the giraffe.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He than orders some drinks.

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What's the opposite of a joke. An anti-joke.

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How do you stop a bus? Put the brakes on.

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I love you very much.

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A man was drowning in a lake and so he asked God to save him. A man on a boat came by and said to the drowning man "Do you need any help?" The drowning man said "Yes! Thank God a boat came for me!" So the man on the boat pulled the man from the water and saved him.

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Q. how many Americans does it take to screw in a light-bulb? A. usually it only takes one, but if the ladders is unsteady he might need one or two friends to help hold the ladder

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Yo mama so fat she was diagnosed with diabetes and now has to regulate her daily intake of foods.

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A baby seal walks in to a club

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What did Batman Tell Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile

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Your mom is so fat she has type 2 diabetes.

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Why is one side of a geese formation heading south always longer than the other? It has more geese

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Tie her up and force her to watch as you brutally murder her entire family.

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What do you call a mix between a beaver and a mammal? You can't mix beavers and mammals, and even if I had said a platypus that would not have been funny.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say mustache? ...No. I wish you had said mustache.

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Where did Officer Blackman find the missing child? A shallow grave.

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You have cancer

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What's better than winning the special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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How many jews can you fit in a buick? 6...only if you squeeze 4 in the back.

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Hey dude ask me if im a tree!? Are you a tree? No

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why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to get the waffle ice cream cone that was on the ground next to the little child who got hit by a bus.

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How did sally fall off the swings? she had no arms. Knock knock, who is there? Not sally.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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