What's under there? I'm not falling for that one...

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What would Marylin Monroe be doing right now if she was alive? Clawing her way out of her coffin.

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A Jew, an Irishman and a Russian walk into the bar and the bartender says, "Get the Hell out."

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Why is my penis 2 inch hard? Because I rape little boys with it and there tight little asshole are crushing it

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What do you call John Lennon without glasses? A skeleton, because John Lennon is dead.

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your momma's so fat that we are all seriously concerned for her health.

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Why did the elephant die? It was murdered by poachers for it's valuable ivory tusks.

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A drunkard walked into a bar, and up to the bartender. He proceeded to **** the **** until he ******. I proceeded to break down in immense frustration over censorship.

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What did Stephen Hawking say to his daughter? Nothing, his illness prevents him from talking. And letting a high-tech wheelchair make human sounds isn't talking!!!

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How do you get a Jew into a car? Tell him to get i the car.

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Why are all women bad drivers? All of them aren't.

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what did one lady say to another lady we are both ladies

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Anti-Joke is a sticky wicket.

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Hey, what do you call an absent-minded person? I'm sorry what did you say?

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Q.A zebra somehow managed to get out of the zoo and started running all around the town. After some time he saw a zebra crossing(not an original zebra crossing the road but the black and white stripes)on the road.He stoppped suddenly.WHY? A. He was too tired to run any more!!!

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How many immature teenagers does it take to screw in a light bulb? Your Mum.

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Dyslexic drunk died choking on his own vimto last night

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It had a heart attack. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey

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Why was 6 afraid of 7. Because 7 was a terrorist

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Why was the gay man gay? Because he likes touching other guys penises

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What did the T-Rex say to the caveman? Nothing. Tyrannosaurus Rex was a prehistoric land animal that roamed the Earth roughly 65 million years before the appearance of man. Making such a conversation impossible.

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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Why did the boy get hit by a bus? HE didn't. He watched where he was going.

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How did the black guy get knocked out? He was hit by a fridge.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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