What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

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Why did Bruno Mars explode? He caught a grenade for ya.

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Wait, I am sleepy as the world which spawned you Nero, but which comment is mine again?

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Smell mop. Smell mop who. *giggle*

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks why the long face? The horse, unable to comprehend human speech, promptly craps on the floor and leaves.

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Jimmy can't drive the tractor. Why can't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because he's a patato

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked: "Why the long face?" The horse said: "My wife just died."

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what did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? we are both lawyers

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why are there so many peadofiles in the world? sexy kids.

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obama

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Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.The chicken was very distressed and trying to get away from the angry mob that followed close behind it.The chicken was never seen again. If you see a distressed chicken please contact your local police station.

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why can't a chicken cross a road without it being questioned?

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Diana- hey i havnt seen you all summer. Whaaat did you do over the summer? Paul- contract HIV Diana- ...oh ...

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So I was making love to my cat the other day, and my pet dog comes in.

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Joe: Hey, why are your counters all red and your blender looks broken? Me: The same reason why Mrs. Johnson's baby is missing. ajl

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Senior Sergeant Thomas the officer investigating your current rape and insect charges. Please open the door now.

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A priest, a pedophile and a rapist walk into a bar. He orders a drink.

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Gretta has five legs? -no

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why did the hater hate? everyone else has a much better life

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What's worse than an asian driver? A blindfolded asian driver.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? The mailman! The mailman who? *opens door* Just kidding, I'm actually an axe-murderer!

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What did Elmer Fudd say when Bugs Bunny got away again? "Oh, dat dawn wabbit, I'ww get it some day".

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You're so vein you are probably a tube that conveys blood from various parts of the body to the heart.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops