What did the little boy get after falling and hitting his face on the ground? A prolonged nosebleed. And Leukemia.

A Jew and a German meet by chance in a bar. They exchange pleasantries and order drinks. At the end of the evening they leave, having made a friend.

2 squirrels with 2 massive boners and 1 little boner.

why Is the teen's sock crusty? he stepped in the glue that his little sister was using for her art project.

Roses are red violets are blue, your library book is overdue, and if you dont pay the fine...i'll punch you in the mouth.

A duck walks into a bar. The duck walks over to the bartender and orders a beer. "put it on my bill." he says. The bartender angrily grabs the duck and kicks him out of the bar, because the duck has done this many times, but has never once paid his bill to the bar. The duck is an alcoholic and is slowly ruining his relationship with his family.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

What happened to the guy who took more lineage then he should have? He went to sleep.

The awkward moment when you don't know whether to like or dislike this because you think I want like so you are gonna dislike but what If I want dislikes, but what if I want likes, you are confused Antijokeception....

It takes a minute to know somebody, an hour to fall in love, but a lifetime to forget. Once, my mom forgot me at Disney World.

What is Kanye West's favorite type of sea-food? Lobster Bisque with a side of french fries.

roses are red violets are blue i smell meth abkfjbekfhbkfsdshjfbkhb

what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

What do you get when you cross a leopard and Chuck Norris? I don't know. Probably something like a furry yellow Chuck Norris with black spots and sharp teeth.

Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? Three bee stings. Whats worse than three bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse then the holocaust? Four bee stings.

Q: are you gay? A: maybe

What did Heinrich Himmler say to the chicken? I'll take that liver thanks.

Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The pilot was a potato.

Why did a boy get slapped in the hand? A; because he had it in the persons face

What do you calk a dirty mexican? a hard working gardener

What did the doctor say to the seriously ill patient? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

When life gives you lemons, That's physically impossible. Life cannot physically hand you lemons.

What do you call a bunch of Mexicans running down a hill jail brake

What's in a glass and drinky? A drink

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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