A black duck walks into a bar. Duck: "I'll have a beer." Bartender: " How you paying for that?" Duck: "Put it on the tax payers."

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what is the best invention ever created ? ............ PORN !!!!

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What do you call a girl who can run faster than me? Virgin

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Q. What do you call a bashed black man laying on pavement? A. Neapolitan

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how do goldfishes drown? you pull them backward water fills there lung and there die

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What has eyes but can not see, and rolls everywhere it goes? A man who fought for your freedom and lost both his eyesight and legs in doing so. Have some respect.

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How did the seal die? It went clubbing ... Then overdosed on ecstasy, it was very sad.

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why did the little girl throw a clock out of the window? because she wanted to see time fly

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Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

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Why didn't Jimmy do well at school? Because he was recently in a car accident, which severely damaged his brain, making it difficult for him to learn things, because of his severely damaged brain, which he got in a car accident, which he was recently involved in.

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The other day I went into the bathroom to take a poo, It was Glorious I flushed the toilet and everything.

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a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and bacomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into shit.

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What did little Ben's mom give him for Christmas? Nothing. She died last month

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What Sound does a baby make in a blender? I don't know I'm to busy masturbating to it

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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why do you kill people in call of duty you don't you kill computer made figures

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Why? Because.

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How do you know a black man's been in your backyard? If you throw a barbecue and your friends of African-American descent decide to bring cold cuts.

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What's the hardest part about blending a baby? My D**K

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Mother Theresa, Billy Graham, and Joseph Smith walk into a bar. Just kidding, no they didn't.

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I'd like to advertise the love of Jesus in Kobane. Do u join me next Monday? :D

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What's worse than seeing another antijoke with "The Holocaust" punchline repeated? The Holocaust.

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What's long and black? A long and black object.

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Q: What do you say when you see your T.V. floating at night? A: That's so frickin awesome

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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