Why did the hipster get burned? Because he was a volunteer fireman.

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Why wasn't the cab driver sent to prison after bombing the school? It was a suicide bombing.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

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What did Tarzan say to the elephant?... "Hi elephant." A few weeks later, the elephant had grown a mustache and gotten a pair of sunglasses. What did Tarzan say to him then?... Nothing, he didn't recognize him.

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A man walks into a boar. The tusked beast accepts his apology.

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a robber walks into a bank. he steals everything and kills the guards

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What's more epic than a man in a gorilla suit? A man in a gorilla suit with a banana.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer murdered his family

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why did the cow go to the theater? to see the new movies pick one and have a good time.

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Knock knock? Who is there? Nobody. Those were noises coming from your head.

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Skinny people fart less.

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How do you make a kids parents mad? Fly an SR71-BLACKBIRD into him.

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Why was the black guy homeless? because he has been affected severely by the credit crunch, been made redundant and had his home repossessed

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What's black and blue and hates sex? The 13 year old tied up in my basement.

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Why did Jimmy fall off of his bike? Well, he was always known for his lack of balance.

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Q: What do you call cheese that isn't yours? A: Cheese.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because earlier that day, the chicken was taking a shiit, and when he went to wipe, there was no toilet tissue, so he ran upstairs to his parents room, and shot them both with a shotgun, then he ate them while they were still gasping for air, then the neighbors heard the gunshots so they came over to make sure everything was alright, but little did they know that the chicken planned for it and they were electricuted to a crisp by the fence, oh yeah, why did the chicken cross the road? Because the store for chips was across the street

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A man walks into a bar and sees another man crying at the other end he asked what's wrong the man replies well its a long story I have time replyed the other man ok well me and my wife are always arguing. So I divided to go to the library after hours of reading I see a book about history and as im reading it its time to go home and when I was going to check it out I forgot my library card I get home and me and my wife make up and have a baby thats not bad at all said the other man yea you've never lost ur library card

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Why did the hippo drink the water? Because it was thirsty

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A man walks into a bar and wakes up in the hospital with a mild concussion.

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Dad: Blind side was the black kid who played tight end. Me: Offensive line. Dad: Sorry, African American kid.

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Q:Whats the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? A:One less drunk

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Why are lawers are so scared of Jerry bryant? Because he bites

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Why cant Stevie Wonder read? Because he is blind

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops