A man walks into a bar. He orders a beer, then suddenly dies of a heart attack.

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Why couldn't Sally celebrate hollaween? Because she's not allowed to take candy from strangers. Also Sally died a week ago in a car crash.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because six cheated on seven and slept with nine.

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Why does the same anti-jokes pop up over and over again? Because people have no creativity.

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Why couldn't the girl go to the bathroom? Because she was obese.

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Roses are red violets are blue vodka cost less than dinner for two

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What did the horse say to the man? The man woke up from his dream so he didn't know either

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Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their car with a coat hanger. They had left the keys inside and no-one was around to help.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? This site.

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look at your sister now look at me now look at your sister now look at me you probably have now realized that you cant see me.

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There was a man posting an anti-joke... He had no life

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Why did the boy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs

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Why did the Harry Potter fan cry in school? She ran out of tampons.

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your mom is so fat she is at high risk of a future heart attack and should be taken to a cardiologist

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The saying "When Pigs Fly" Can easily be canceled. Just tie a rocket and wings to it and let it go.

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Why did the duck cross the road? Because there was a gunman on the same side of the path and it would most likely be safer to avoid making eye contact

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A young black guy was explaining how he was raised by a single mother

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i was quite upset when my girlfriend called me a peodifile, what does she know, shes only 6.

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Neo Nero, why did you not tell me that Nero7 is dead? When was the funeral held? Where is he buried? At point Zero? Please I need to know, he was basically my father, or rather all that my father never was, at least I dont have to wonder if he will ever come back... I understand your anger, even if I am not even close to following your extreme ideals, please tell me the code, the proof that you are not one of the Spetznas or the Nazi`s. "Eliza"

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::ring::ring::ring:: Hello? Is your refrigerator running? Yes, yes it does! Why? I work for a local home appliance superstore and we are having a special on repairs and maintenance. Would you like to try our home appliance maintenance offer? I'm sorry no! I do not actually have a refrigerator. I only have a cooler. Bye! ::the man shuts off his cell phone and sets it on top of his styro-foam cooler as he mumbles to himself alone while on his boat, "Darn advertisement offers!" and continues to fish in the middle of the lake::

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What's sad about a girl getting hit in the face with a shovel? The shovel got dented..

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Whats the difference between a house and a mouse If you think about it , quite a lot really

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mirror mirror on the wall who has the most desire of them all? Matt Daly!

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A woman was in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband. Shortly after she brings the sandwich to him and he thanks her seeing as his disabled legs prevent him from walking to the kitchen and making one himself. His wife later heads to her job as a firefighter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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