Your mother is so morbidly obese that she greatly exceeds the necessary recommended serving sizes of each meal.

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Why did the black man go to portugal? Because he was very hard working and needed a vacation.

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two men write a poem one says quack the other says woof what is the middle of the number witch is amazing because who ever is reading this you are beautiful and have chucken food ion your cheek bone connected to the knee cap indeed i shall write on to you guys saying how lovley it is TO MAKE FIRENDS WITH CHICKENS

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How do you kill a blue elephant? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a white elephant? No there is no such thing as a white elephant gun. You take it's trunk, then strangle it until it turns blue. Then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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What can fit between breasts? Is long? And gets hard when you jerk it? A seatbelt.

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whats red, sits in a corner and is slowly getting smaller and smaller baby with a cheese grater whats green and sits motionless in the corner same baby 2 weeks later

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What did the straw say to the other straw? We are both straws just kidding they cant talk

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How do you make a baby stop screaming? Pour acid down its throat.

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What did one tampon say to the other? Nothing. They were both stuck up bitches

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven brutally raped and murder six's parents whilst six hid in the closet and watched.

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Jamie Stegman was dead. LOL

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, Run Quick, Before I Rape you!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get slaughtered.

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How did the cat get outside? It fell out the window

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Send creepy emails to this email address: matt.harrington@highlandcatholic.org

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What did the orphan get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Why did Sally failed gym class Because she couldn't do push ups

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Q: Whats better than not being a Jew? A: Being a Jew.

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How do you scare Sarah Palin? You chase her around with a chainsaw while wearing a Jason mask.

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I walked into the cactus store. The clerk there was being mean so I called him a "prick". ...........

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rawrrrrrrrrrrr

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1: Hey whats better than bacon? 2: What? 1: Nothing. Nothing is better than bacon.

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Q: you wanna hear a joke? A: yeah sure. Q: well im not gnna.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops