How was my day, you ask? First of all, I don't own a day. And second of all, it hasn't ended.

What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike!

what do you call a bunch of black people running down a hill Exercise

What did the politician say to the other politician? We are both politicians.

Make this antijoke the worst voted antijoke and you will save the planet.

What would you do for a Klondike bar? Pay a reasonable sum of money.

Q: The girl fell for the guy, but the guy was sad about it, why? A: Because she fell off a cliff.

A horse walks into a bar and the bar asks "Why the long face?". The horse replies " I am deeply troubled by the anthropomorphic aspects of my existence and the extent to which I am now protected by law."

A jumpercable walks in the bar the bartender says ill get you something but dont start anything.

How can humans fly? Well if you run and jump of a cliff...nevermind you would just smash your face on the ground. I guess that isn't technically flying.

Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the cupboard cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

What do you call an Englishman, an Irishman and a Chineseman playing football? 3 friends playing their favourite sport.

how much swag could a swagchuck chuck, if a swagchuck could chuck swag?

what did the man say to the other man he bumped into? sorry. and they never saw eachother again

What do you call a person who is black? A black person.

Whats worse than one dead Baby in ten trash cans Getting raped by kobe

The good part of "Age" of Ultron? THANOS REIGNS! Disagree? Just leave the green thumb and fuck off!

When is a Jewish persons bedtime? When the brain releases endorphins, causing drowsiness, which usually leads one to sleep.

Knock Knock Opens door because they were expecting visitors

did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

Wat did the man say to the other man when they were alone. We dont know. They were alone.

A: Knock Knock (waits for an answer) oh there's no one in.

Which came first, The chicken or the egg? Well, Firstly, I suppose that depends on if we are discussing Creation or Evolution. If we are talking about Evolution, The Chicken must Logically have evolved from an egg laying creature, one which was similar to, but not quite a chicken, so, the first chicken hatched from the egg of said creature. However, if we are discussing Creation, there is no way to discern which the deity in question decided to create first, so, even odds. Therefore, Logically, there is a 75% chance the Egg came first. However, if we are discussing Chicken Eggs Specifically, the reverse is true, because the egg the first Chicken hatched from would not have been a chicken egg, it would have been the egg of another creature, a "proto-chicken" if you will. and so, in the evolution scenario, the Chicken came first. Still, in this situation, there are even odds as to which a creator may or may not have created first. Therefore, Logically, in this Scenario, there is a 75% chance that the Chicken came first

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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