How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

What does the Bill in Bill Clinton stand for? Bilious.

knock knock who's there? the paperboy the paperboy who? i lied, i'm a serial rapist, you should have looked through the peephole

What did Jesus say to the jews? Fuck you.

Q. What do you get when you mix eggs, mashed potatoes and salt? A. A pretty good batter for mashed potato pancakes.

Why can't Hellen keller drive? Because she's a woman.

An overweight person falls down the stairs.. They had to be taken to A&E as they suffered very serious injuries.

Chose to describe yourself: Green thumb: Tall wealthy, good looking, intelligent man with a model wife, a ferrari expensivo, a hotel just for yourself. Red thumb: A below average piece of shit? Green thumb? Dont lie to me you piece of sh*t!

Knock Knock who's there? Steve Steve who? Steve. I already told you my name.

How do you make a 5 year old cry? Kill their parents.

Q: 1 out of every 44 presidents can dunk, who is it? A: How the hell am i suppost to know

Ask me if I am a Truck Are You a Truck No

...................__ ............./´¯/'...'/´¯¯`·¸ ........../'/.../..../......./¨¯\ ........('(...´...´.... ¯~/'...') .........\.................'...../ ..........''...\.......... _.·´ ............\..............( BroFist

Why don't Vikings read the New York Times? Because they all died centuries ago. And none of them live in New York.

What do you get when you cross a lion and a tiger? A Ligor.

Why can't a T-rex clap its hands? It's extinct.

Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None...they can cook in the dark.

Knock knock. Who's there? Big Brother. Big Brother who? That's right. ALL are who, Akbar!

What's the one game that black people are good at? Flashlight tag.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

What do you say to the man break dancing?? You don't, call an ambulance he is having an epileptic fit.

Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and ferrari? I dont have a ferrari in my garage!

12 in general

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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