Is it a bird, Is it a plane, I don't know what it is but it's heading straight for the World Trade Centre

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What did the Asian say to his racist friend? You're racist

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How many trees does it take to screw in a light bulb? Trees are incapable of screwing light bulbs

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Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

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Why did the boy get hit by a bus? HE didn't. He watched where he was going.

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And if we met in 1780, I was a white southern aristocratic plantation owner and you were my dark skinned servant lady ... slave Whenever I could get away from the Mrs., I'd go to your shed and then I'd steal you kisses. But let's be serious, I'd still work you full time as a slave, there's a difference between romantic language and a complete disregard for socioeconomic trends.

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Why didnt the 14 year old get her period? Because she had gotten pregnant by her father

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What's up? Up Adverb: Toward the sky or a higher position. Preposition: From a lower to a higher point on (something); upward along: "I climbed up a flight of steps". Adjective: Directed or moving toward a higher place or position: "the up escalator". Noun: A period of good fortune. Verb: Do something abruptly or boldly: "she upped and left him". Synonyms: adverb. upward - upwards - aloft - above - upstairs - overhead preposition. on - upon - over - along - with adjective. rising noun. ascent - rise - upgrade verb. raise - enhance - increase - lift - rise

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Why didn't the man walk up the stairs? He had an acorn stairlift.

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A boy is diagnosed with terminal cancer. His family prays for him and he still dies.

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A rapist walks into a bar He orders a drink He wakes up the next morning naked on a hot chick He leaves not realizing that he is nude and is promptly escorted by the police to jail

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Why did the duly oppressed individual where sunglasses? Because the sun was bright.

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A man didn't feel well so he went to the toilet. He had explosive diahrria, then felt better.

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An Aussie, a Mexican and an Asian walk into a bra. You read that wrong.

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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Why is it good to date twenty eight year olds? Because there is twenty of them.

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What do you call a KKK member? ...racist

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? This year I'm going to win the golden brief case!

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What did the doctor say to the seriously ill patient? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares, it's a chicken.

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yo mama is so old, so old that she was given senior citizen discount at the restaurant.

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I man walks into a bar. He drinks four beers, gives the bartender his keys, and takes a cab home. The next day he gets his best friend to drop him off at the bar, picks up his car, and is three minutes early to work.

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Why did the bus crash? The driver was a loaf of bread.

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knock knock whos there make up make up who hahahaha you said make a poo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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