How many Jews can you fit in a car? Statistically speaking, in a brief survey done by the United States Traffic Commission, they stated that a standard 4-door sedan had the highest percentile of drivers. So, in regards to the legal system, a person may only fit, in fact, 5 jews in a car.

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In Soviet Russia it's pretty cold.

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Why did the chicken cross the road I don't know

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A blonde, a brunette and a red head are having a discussion on current issues. The brunette says she would like to see improvements in the environment. The red head says she would like to see the economy prosper. The blonde says she has to take a poop.

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What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

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As we had been trying for some months now, I called my wife to ask her the result of her pregnancy test. A stranger answered and promptly told me she was killed in a car crash.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

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You know whats funny? Women's rights

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Do you know what would happen if Hitler was still alive today. Nothing he's not.

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Why did the boy fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he wanted to!

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What is the worst thing to say to a dying person? After you die I'm going to defile your corpse, nan.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Run it over with a lawn mower!

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Have you seen Stevie wonders new house? No Neither has he.

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wheres an unexpected place to find sand? a human pancreas.

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knock knock Goodbye

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When you see birds flying in a V why is one side of the V always longer than the other? There are more birds on that side

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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That awkward moment when... Your mom is a guy.

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Why can't Hellen keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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Chose to describe yourself: Green thumb: Tall wealthy, good looking, intelligent man with a model wife, a ferrari expensivo, a hotel just for yourself. Red thumb: A below average piece of shit? Green thumb? Dont lie to me you piece of sh*t!

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

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What did Jesus say to the jews? Fuck you.

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I've been reading these for the past hour and you guys are just out right terrible! -Sarah

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops