What did the farmer say when he finally found his tractor? 'Where's my tractor?'

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Why did the kid lose his nose? because his brother chopped it off with an axe.

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A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

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Q: What has no color, no shape, no size, and was born in your mind? A: The thought you just had about this anti-joke.

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Patient: Doctor, do I have cancer? Doctor: Yes. Patient: Will I live? Doctor: No. Patient: So what do I do? Doctor: SUCK IT UP!!!

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What do you call a murderer who killed a black man. kkk

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Why didn't John get a present for Christmas? Because John died eight months ago.

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What do you call a midget cripple with cerebral palsy? Unfortunate

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Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

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Why does Ray Charles always smile? Because he doesn't know he's black.

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Why did the man hit the little boy? His brakes failed.

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There's two muffins in an oven, the first muffin says "Woah, it's really hot in here!". The second muffin says "Oh my God! A talking muffin!"

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A man walks into a bar. He is rushed to the hospital and has his wounds treated.

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i get knocked down, but i don't get up again. my leg is broken and therefore makes it extremely difficult for me to stand up on my own.

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What did the jewish man say to the Irish guy at the bar? Are you Irish?

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What time is it in Florida? Time To Eat The President Of The United States!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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Q. What do you call a woman who, after 72 hours of hard labor, finally gives birth? A. Mom.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was very scary.

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Why did the girl commit suicide? She got raped

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whats the difference from a jew and a christian the jew got arrested for rape

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Instructions to make origami. 1.) Staple bagels to face 2.) Ask someone else to do it. 3.) Hang yourself because you are too stupid to figure it out yourself

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What's the difference between a black man and a couch? One is a human being and one is a piece of furniture.

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Yes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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