What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea? It gets Wet.

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I was raped the other day... I still did more work than the bitch

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What's funnier than an anti-joke? Sarcasm.

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How many dead guys does it take to build a shed? None. The contractor did it for 40 dollars an hour using maple wood.

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what do you get if you cross a scotsman , who knows nothing about football and a indian? Blackburn rovers, and a good night out

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women are like puzzles because prior to 1920 neither had the right to vote, puzzles still don't.

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Your mamas so old. When she farted dust came out.

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Why was the black man out of a job? because he was recently laid off and had not found any job offerings that he would be interested in

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Knock Knock Whos there Me Oh, come in

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What's the difference between an elephant and a grape? They're both fruit. Except the elephant.

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a duck was clearing out his apartment when he came across a rat. the rat turned into a genie. 'i will grant you 3 wishes' said the genie. 'whats the catch?' replied the duck 'can i touch your dinkle?'

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knock knock? whose there? i dont know. i dont know who? i dont know.

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A penguin is driving through the desert when his car breaks down. He has it towed to a service station in the nearest town to be repaired. The mechanic tells him that it may be a while so he might want to take a stroll around town, find something to do for a while and check back a little later for an update. The penguin decides that as it is so hot in the desert town, and he is accustomed to a much cooler climate, he might enjoy a bit of ice cream. He walks to the local ice cream parlor, orders a large vanilla cone, and proceeds to devour the treat in a flash, covering himself in ice cream in the process. He has ice cream on his flippers, his face, and all down his stomach; he is virtually covered in the white, sticky goo. Upon returning to the service station to check in on the mechanic and his car, the mechanic say to him, "Well, it looks like the seal on your head gasket leaked, the transmission is shot, and you appear to be covered in ice cream." To which the penguin replies, "Yes, I have made quite the mess of myself. Today just isn't my day."

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What's big and grey and can't climb trees? A car park.

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I typed in in a Anti-joke and realized it was kind of hard.

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Why did the deer stop running? It was hit by a car

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Q) What did one chicken say to the other? A) Nothing. Chickens can't talk.

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Detroit has a low crime rate

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Why doesn't superman eat peanuts? Because he doesn't like them.

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse being a horse and doesnt understand english is confused and scared by its surroundings it gallops away knocking over a few tables.

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Why did the boy throw butter out the window? To test the principles of gravity.

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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?white vans

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Man 1: my wife has lovley perfume. She smells like a peppermint cream. Man 2: Yeah, I know, I spent eight hours shagging her last night.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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