Why did the girl fall off of the swings? Because I threw a refrigerator at her.

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what do you call a black man in the bank holding a bag of money. One wealthy man

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A. Big feet, you know what that means B. He has to order his shoes on line because they don't carry his size in stores.

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What ryhmes with turtle? räpe

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What is your favorite color???? My mom I got u s o godd.

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they've may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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i put a oie in the oven, it baked

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. The fight began and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing you say when you don't want to fight anymore and you let the other person win?" The other guy says to the challanger, "I give up?" Then the challenger yells. "I WIN!"

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So I have an idea that will solve both world population and hunger problems! I call it the Omni-Abortion law. The idea is that all babies must be aborted and then eaten. Progressive, right?

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Why did the chiken cross the road? idk, i can't talk to chikens

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what has 2 legs and red all over half a cat.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Why did the baby fall off the swing? Because i hit it with a bat.

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What's red and can sing? Elmo

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What is worse than the holocaust. A worm in MY apple!

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Why did Romney loose the election? Because Obama had more votes

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Wanna buy some meth.

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What's worse than a dead baby inside a microwave? A microwave inside a dead baby.

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kkkk

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why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

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Why did the all black baseball team beat the all white baseball team? Because the black team scored more runs than the white team.

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who's driving? The taxi driver.

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why was the little boy sad? he had a frog stapled to his face.

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There was a boy named Steven, a son of a rich business man. Steven was an interesting child though, as he always kept care to one of his possessions. That possession being a plain, old, brown box. On Steven's fourth birthday his father said he could have anything in the world he wanted, just name it. Steven said he wanted two quarters to put in his box. The father agreed and gave his son two quarters to put in his box. Every year the father would say he could have anything he wished for, and Steven just asked for two quarters. Nothing more. On Steven's 18th birthday he got into a severe car crash. The father stood over the hospital bed where Steven lay. "I can get you the best doctors in the world. They can save you, please let me get you this for your birthday!" The boy shook his head. "All I want is two quarters" Steven replied. The father was distraught. "Son, tell me why you've wanted these two quarters every year you have been alive instead of anything else in the world". The boy complied. "Fine I'll tell you." Then Steven died before he could tell the father. The End.

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Q:What's colorful and waves like a flag? A: A flag.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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