Why did the man smoke pot in the roller coaster? Because he was dyslexic and read the sign wrong and thought it read "You must be high to go on this ride."

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did Valerie get for her birthday? Nothing. Because no one loves her

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

thumb_up thumb_down -26

why does clive keep getting crunk? because no girl satisfies him as much as geros

thumb_up thumb_down -26

what's worse then death? finding that your adopted, no one loves you and you mother raped you at the tender age of five.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Your mom is so ugly that she often finds it difficult attracting members of the opposite sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why can't Ray Charles read? Cuz he is blind You illiterate uneducated racist bastard trying to say it was because he was black.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Yo mamas so ugly that when she looked out the window, she was arrested for mooning.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What do you call 100 dead babies in my garage? Murder.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

You know whats better than 24? 25

thumb_up thumb_down -26

whats your name whats the color of the sky whats the oppisite of down

thumb_up thumb_down -26

why did the kid drop his toy? a dog was ripping out his throat

thumb_up thumb_down -26

So a guy walks into a bar and says, "I can hold a spoon in between my butt-cheeks." Jillian Michaels asked him if that will help him lose weight.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And so are you But the roses have wiltered The violets are dead The sugar bowl is empty And so is your head

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did Jimmy fall off of his bike? Well, he was always known for his lack of balance.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What do people and jelly beans have in common? Nothing. One is a living creature, and the other is a tasty treat.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Knock Knock! It's me! Hello? Hello! Why didn't they answer him? He was at the desert, with a disconnected phone. Also, my Captcha for this is "lose face" Good job solf mediya

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the Mexican shoe salesman say to the man? Excuse me, do you whih way to main street?

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A man was found dead, in an ice cream van, the other day. He was covered from head to toe in hundreds and thousands, with two flakes sticking out of his ears. The police say it was a tragedy and will be informing his next of kin in the next few days.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A Gamer walks into the tavern, the bartender says to him, "just dont act like you control the place!"

thumb_up thumb_down -26

why did rhys jones get shot. because he was there

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What do you call a shark on land A dead shark

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What do you call 1 + 1 = 2? i like boobs

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why are you on this sight? You're procrastinating. I am too

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops