What did a boy dying from cancer get for Christmas? The news that his cancer progressed and he would soon die. He underwent a surgery that got rid of the cancer and he was cured. He ran out of the hospital in excitement and got hit by a bus. He recovered slowly, but lived. By this time it was June and his birthday, he returned to school later that year. He got called fat and committed suicide.

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A muslim and a jew meet each other in a dark ally...... they give each other strange looks because they are both in a dark ally.

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Why did a black man put his hands on a white man? They were hugging.

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It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from. So, you should probably leave.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Why couldn't the blonde get pregnant? Because she was dead, and her reproductive organs had stopped functioning.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And I hate Jewish people

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What do you call a Rhino and a Lion having sex? Pointless, since they can't reproduce

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What did the snowman put on his head? Nothing; snowmen are inanimate.

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How does a yeti say hi? Raaawwwrrrr

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Why is it not safe for turkeys to do maths? Because they don't have the mental capacity to carry out the calculations correctly, which would be a danger in jobs such as engineering or the space industry. Furthermore, they are unable to understand the concept of numbers or symbols and therefore have no motivation to solve mathematical problems; and even if they did, they don't have the dexterity or education to write out the solutions.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A kind hearted serial killer who will win your heart emotionally and then shoot you to death unexpectedly.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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What is the difference between a horse? All the legs are of same length, especially the back ones.

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Roses are Red Your Face Has Turned Blue This Pillow I have Is Smothering You

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ryan. Ryan who? Ryan Seacrest.

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What did George Bush say when 9/11 happened? "Silly pilots! The airport isn't in a building!"

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Q:What is yellow and has wheels A: A banana I was joking about the wheels

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What is better than a dead baby nailed to a tree? A dead baby nailed to 10 Trees.

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Why do giraffes have long necks? So they can reach higher, un-eaten leaves.

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If you have me you want to share me, if you share me you no longer have me. What am I? (a secrect)

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There once was a student named Bob. Every morning he would rush to his job. But one day there was rain, He slipped in front of his train, There used to be a student named Bob.

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What's slower than mollasses? Your fattass mother!

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Why did the teacher give out homework? she is a teacher

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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