Roses are red, Violets are blue if something smells bad, its gotta be you! Roses are red this much is true but violets are purple not f***ing blue!

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if i have 2 bananas, and you have 2 bananas, then together we have 4 bananas what are the chances?

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Q: what's yellow and can't use chopsticks. A: corn

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I touch myself at night.

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Why do black people eat Kentucky Fried Chicken? Because there is Protein in chicken and without protein their bodies would succumb to such diseases as Kwashiorkor and Cachexia.

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What's white and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? A refrigerator.

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Roses are red Grass is green Get in the van If you know what I mean

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there were two cyclists cycling down a main road in china at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace, one being chinese and the other irish. why did the irish man get stopped and the chinese man not? because the irish man had in fact raped and murdered a young child in his native home town and then fled the country to china.

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How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

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How do u get suzzy off a swing? You tell her to get off

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A: Why do you look like a dog? B: Idk.

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Doctor: I have good news and bad news. The good news is that your parents survived the car accident. Kid: And the bad news is? Doctor: I have a horrible sense of humor, they're both dead. I'm so sorry.

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why dont i play socker because im not waering socks

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What's the difference between heaven and hell? Hell likes you more.

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What did the famer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?!?!

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Guess what? I like trains.

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What do a cow and a banana have in common? Neither of them is a police officer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who are we kidding, when have you ever seen a chicken crossing a road?

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a shovel 17 times

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Why did the husband and wifes marriage fail? The husband slept with many other women and is putting his family through a hellacious situation.

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Q: How do you turn lights on and off? A: With a switch

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What did the bolt say to the wall?? nothing ,they just screwed.

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whats brown and stick? brown paint that has not dried yet.

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Yo mammas so fat she wears big clothes!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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