Q: what's yellow and can't use chopsticks. A: corn

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what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

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Roses are red Grass is green Get in the van If you know what I mean

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there were two cyclists cycling down a main road in china at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace, one being chinese and the other irish. why did the irish man get stopped and the chinese man not? because the irish man had in fact raped and murdered a young child in his native home town and then fled the country to china.

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How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

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A: Why do you look like a dog? B: Idk.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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A plane crashes in a polish cemetery the authorities have found 2000 bodies

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Why couldn't Jimmy ride his bike? Jimmy was a goldfish.

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Why do you call a person who spits in your cheeseburger? A mean person

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's a free drink, you'll wake up in my basement.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Nothing his parents died in a tragic car accident the night before

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Why are there only 50 states in the U.S.A The US gives territories a chance to vote if they want to be states in the US.

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What did the mother of the boy with cancer say on his birthday? - Happy Birthday, too bad you still have cancer.

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How did the clown get the baby to stop crying? He hit it with an axe.

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Dude, you were so drunk last night that you got in a terrible car accident, and now you are paralyzed from the waste down for life.

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What's awesome about going to a no-pants party? Getting stabbed 2 times.

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i've got a little something for you. in fact it's so small you can't see it. it's called spermatazoa

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What did the baby get for his birthday? An Abortion.

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what do you call a girl that just took 15 loads to her face? sasha grey.

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What do you tell your friend who has been cheating on his wife? You're a terrible human being, and she deserves better!

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What did bob say when he was told his beloved parents were dying? "oh"

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What's invisible? A lot of stuff.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops