What do you call a fish with no eyes? Dead.

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My girlfriend said she doesn't like anti jokes and now i'm single ha ha just kidding.... she's dead

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Stevie Wonders said to his friend, "Have you seen my house?" "No" "Neither have I"

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What do you call a baby with no arms or legs? You call a lawyer, and be sure to have him ask the mother if she took Thalidomide during pregnancy.

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whats the best anti joke ever? mine you dipshit

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rose's are red violets are blue I have touretts blblblblblblblblbbl

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Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. One of its legs is both the same

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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what lies in ore an develops a golden tan ken bigleys body

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If the shoe fits....... its probably your size.

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How do you make someone laugh? Tell them this joke.

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What has 3 eyes, green fur and blue ears? Nothing.

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Why can't Micheal J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has Parkinsons..

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A black man and a white man were on an island. They lived in England.

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YOU

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Having a giant, angry ape on steroids rip your heart out and eat it before your eyes as you painfully die from the unbearable pain and rapid blood loss.

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Sex

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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How do you get to pigs in a pen? Move them.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the Light turned green, indicating that it was a safe and appropriate time to cross

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I cant believe they been together after all that shit. (person ask what) and you say your buttchheeeeks:]

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What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

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Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms.

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How do you fit an elephant inside your car? I don't understand why this task would even need to be performed. I have never arrived anywhere in my car and thought "Sure could use an elephant right about now..."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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