chuck norris won the world series of poker using his superior knowledge of counting cards and calculating probability.

A man has a parrot who repeats everything the man says. He constantly complains about his mother-in-law and everytime he says her name it follows with the word bitch. One day she makes a suprise visit and he greets her with a "Oh hello Doris" , he looks in horror to see if the parrot will call her a bitch but instead finds the parrot dead because he forgot to feed it for 4 days.

why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory that a typical person should or could ever possibly need all in one place.

What do you get when you cross a turtle and a platypus? Well, I don't think it's genetically possible by nature, but Turtpus is a pretty funny name.

What happened to the guy who took more lineage then he should have? He went to sleep.

http://www.pollsb.com/photos/o/355988-gay_marriage.jpg

Henry's mom packed Henry sweaters And lots of things besides sweaters Henry went to war He saw lots of gore Logically, he wouldn't need a sweater because he had to wear his uniform during the battle. Did i mention that Henry likes chocolate?

What is the difference between a blond and a mummy? A blond has a brain.

Q: What's worse than being stung by a bee A: The Rwandan Genocide

Knock knock. Who's there? Not your grandma! Cause she's dead! Come to the funeral

Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

who is really lanky? james cornish

Hello

Here come the elephants over the hill!

Q: Whats worse then a minor fender bender? A: Dieing a long painful death by getting stabbed 27 times then getting hit by a car 2 hours later your brother finds you and told you that him and your wife have been cheating on you and your kid is his.

Q: Why was the child sad? A: because a doctor was taking bullet fragments out of his chest.

Horse walks into a bar. Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from. So, you should probably leave.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Teenage pregnancy.

why did the mexican steal the money? because he was financially struggling and needed the money to support his family

Q: Whats horny and likes your leg? A: My dog.

A blonde walks into an electronics store. She asks an assistant, "Can I buy that TV"? He says, "Sure, no problem." She then walks out of the store, happy with the purchase that she made.

What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill.

What's Hitler's favorite drink? Jews (meaning juice)

1 white girl and 2 black men -TRAGIC

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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