God saw himself. Finally, proof.

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What is the difference between a calendar and you? A calendar has dates!!

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Your mother is so fat, that somebody should inform her of the risks of eating unhealthy foods because she could obtain life threatening diseases.

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A construction worker walks into a bar. Lucky he was wearing his hard hat.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenic, and don't have any friends

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A man walks into a bar And compliments the bartender for his great service

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Q: What sound does a baby make when you put it in a blender? A: I don't know; I was too busy trying to find my camera.

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Captain Falcon is eating a restaurant. After he sits down at his table, a waiter comes by to take his drink order. Not wanting to skew his blood alcohol level for his next race, he asks for a non-alcoholic drink. The waiter says, "We only have water and punch. Which would you like?" Captain Falcon replies, "Water, please."

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The funniest thing happened in my dream last night, i dreamed that banks would stop ripping people off and start treating people like humans. How wierd is that :D

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roses are red violets are blue daffodils are yellow pansies are pink

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The pilot was a potato.

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How does an Asian person get overweight? By eating food with a great amount of calories and not burning then off in time.

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Three people are stranded on an island. They didn't want to eat each other because they were friends. They died of starvation.

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Bird is the Word. Actually 'What" is the word.

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how do you confuse a blonde? tap her on both shoulders

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Ah, sorry for my failed attempt at being a witty. Yes, it has been a long day, or so the saying goes.

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What did the cripple wish for when he saw the shooting star? A toothbrush.

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Knock Knock Fuck off. I am new here. I do not know anyone here.

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What's worse than smelly feet? Smelly hands.

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when u cant say fuck say firetruck because it starts with f and it ends with uck ?firetruck?

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My grandma once told me " never trust the blacks"

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A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

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How did Jesus walk on water? Jesus is God in the form of a man, and he is the only human being ever with the ability to perform miracles

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There were three men named manner, poop, and shut up. they all were mad fun of in middle school and ended up hating their parents for giving them such retarded names.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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