A successful, articulate, charming, well mannered, rich, young man walks into a bar.... Every night

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What happened when the football player couldn't get his Coke from the vending machine? He got angry.

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Two polar bears were sitting in a bathtub. One said to the other, "Could you pass the saop?". The other say, "What do you think I am, a typewriter?".

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Q: what happens when Justin Bieber walks into bar? A: three things, blood on the bar floor, another vister at the celebrity hospital, and Justin Bieber with knifes and darts stuck in his chest!

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Old McDonald had a farm. He grew corn there, and got reasonably wealthy. Then he retired to the Bahamas.

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What's worse than finding your whole family dead? Nothing. Finding your family dead is terrible.

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Why did Bob drop his ice cream? Because he got hit with a super models TIttys

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what is my catphrase nothing I am too good to have one

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sadf

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What did one sausage say to the other? Nothing. Sausages don't talk...

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Ok so there were 2 white dudes telling black jokes...so one of the white dudes tells a joke to the other... 1st dude: what's brown and tall? 2nd dude: a tree 1st dude: no that scary black man who looks like he wants to beat us up.

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matt is fat

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Knock knock. I have a doorbell...

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Whats green and gets you really high? A green airplane

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knock knock whos there? your dr you have cancer

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What's worst then leaving a public toilet when you just took a shit and the toilet is now clogged Realising that the maid was waiting for you to get out to clean the toilet...

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an orange and finding a worm.

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What does and elephant and me have in common. Everything, I am an elephant.

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What do you say if you see a black man with blood on his hands and he has a mask on? Thank you doctor for saving my sons life!

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what did one wall say to the other wall Nothing because its physically impossible for walls to talk

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Q. what did the hobo say to the rich guy A. nothing the hobo wa a mute

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God, you know after creating humanity and kinda regretting it and stuff, fell into drinking and betting. He found Sin a fellow poker player, and all was good. Until God, drinking a bit too much bet a bit too many of his creds: Son. Jesus: Yes father. God: Uh, I kinda ended up low on cash on the poker game last night and I kinda well... I am gonna be frank here, I bet you and lost. NeroMetal Not dissing the bible, just enjoying the always brighter side of life eh? ;)

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for christmas? Cancer

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What do you call a chicken with no head? A chicken with no head.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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