What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your BANANA.

What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he's not gonna come

Why did the chicken cross the road? It had gotten out of its coop.

what does a buttler put in a closet ? stuff.

What's the difference between an alien and Obama? - Nothing they are both aliens.

One man asked another man what his favorite sport was. The man replied: " My favorite sport is golf." "Golf requires no physical strength, therefore I do not count it as a sport." Said the man who asked the question.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far from its body.

What is an offensive way to refer to black people from the time of the Flint Stones? Niggers

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

What is worse than ten dead babies nailed to a tree? The holocaust.

How do you acquire a bomb? Go to the bomb store.

What's even funnier than 24? A clown in a tree.

What color is an orange chicken? Fried rice

whats the difference between kroush and a bucket of shit? the bucket

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a pack of wolverines and decided the best idea was to run away, and this decision just happened to involve him crossing a road.

What's the difference between difference and between? One is difference the other is between.

what can't see and has four eyes? a blind kid born with four eyes

How do you make Samuel L. Jackson cry? Trick question...Samuel L. Jackson don't cry. ever...

roses are red violets are black,why is your chest as flat as your back :O

Why did the man have a really short temper? HOW THE **** SHOULD I KNOW???

Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

Mike: Johnny pass me the sauce Johnny: I can't pass you the sauce Mike: Johnny pass me the sauce Johnny: I can't pass you the sauce Johnny could pass Mike the sauce as he has no arms and Mike kept on asking as he has short onset alzheimer's.

Why did labour not win the election in 2010? Because they are clearly shit.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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