Q: What's worse than finding a shrimp platter on a babys hand. A: A baby's hand on a shrimp platter

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Your mom is so ugly, Ew.

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Yo Mama's so fat Everyone is very concerned for her Health.

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What do you call a black pilot? A PILOT

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Your mother is so fat, she really could stand to lose a few pounds.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he was very hungrey and saw some seed on the other side.

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why was the child crying? because his friend just got hit by a van.

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Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar Was it you? No

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knock knock. who's there? 9/11

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what are you talking about. Nets are terrible. Lakers are going to be the best.

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What is the connection between a blonde and a halogen headlamp? There is none, one is a female human being with blonde hair and the other is a headlamp with a halogen lightbulb.

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Why was the fat guy so sad? Because he knew he would die sooner or later, just like every other human being

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Q. Why didn't the Hero rescue the princess? A. Because he crunched some numbers, realized the incredible odds against him, and decided against it.

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why didnt the old man go to his sons birthday he died.........nah i lied he went went

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What did the little boy say before he succumbed to cancer? Nothing. It was too painful.

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How do you confuse a blonde? You put her in a round room and tell her to find the corner.

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Hey, wanna here a dirty joke? A pig fell in mud.

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a man about 65 years old is tired with his life. he begins to realize that it is meaningless to him. whil on his way to commit suicide, he comes across a man with a magicul offer. the magical man is offering to grant him the power to fly. although, the magical man wants something in return. the 65 year old man, says to himself, "i have nothing to lose". so he gives the magical man all his money and possesions he has with him. with a flick of his wrist, the magical man says, "ok, you have now been granted the power to fly". the 65 year old man, overjoyed of how he has the ability to fly runs to the nearest cliff and jumps. too bad the magical man was really male prostitute broke out of money and tricked the 65 year old man into beleiving that he had magical powers to grant him the power to fly. the 65 yeard old man died from impact and the male prostitute walked away with a wallet full of money.

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I will create more jobs for americans

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i think dylan is turnimg gay for amy

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The declaration of Independence was singed in? Pen.

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What you do you call a gay man with no arms and legs? His name.

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if got a joke if fogot it

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What did Stephen Hawking say to the prostitute? A several garbled and mostly inaudible comment that she could not understand.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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