Question: What do you call the black guy wearing a white shirt? Answer: Steve. His parents game him the name at birth, and he is called that ever since.

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what's black, white, and red all over? a penguin stuck in a blending machine

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why did the boy drop his icecream?? he got hit by a bus

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What did one door say to the other door? - Nothing, doors can't talk

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Once upon a time there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly, everyone died. The end.

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How do you kill a blue elephant? Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? Hold it's nose until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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-Your mom worked as a prostitute and died a virgin.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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try slamming a revolving door

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks: dude, what happened to your eye? The man replies: abuse.

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What do you call a lion eating a gazelle? the food chain.

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Roses are car Violets are giraffe this poem makes no sense microwave

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Knock know! Who's there? Aids! Aids who? Aids! Aids who? Orange! Orange who? Orange you glad I'm not aids!

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Doctor, I am afraid of getting sexually abused. Hmm, sounds serious, take off all your clothes so we can get a proper look.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the tree fall over? The koala forgot to let go.

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Josh is sooo great at blowing, xoxo Dylan Hodge.

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Two scuba divers are playing cards on the bottom of the ocean. One asks "have you got amy threes?" Then they both die from maintained exposure to the incredible pressure at the bottom of the sea. One left behind three children.

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What's tan, red, black and brown? Your face. Two days later... In the mausoleum. "Your face"

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What smells like weed? the person who smoked it.

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What would a man say if you urinated all over his legs? WHAT THE DEUCE?

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Why was the boy cold? Because he couldn't afford clothing.

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So a Jewish, Hispanic, and Asian man are on a plane. The pilot turns to them and says "aren't you tired of this?"

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What did the wall say to the floor? Nothing.

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Why did Mary fall of the swing? Because she had no arms. Who pushed johnny of the cliff? Certainly not Mary

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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