I can prove I'm a psychic - this post is going to receive a lot of dislikes.

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a black guy, a handicap, a pervert, and a fat guy are sitting in at a booth in a bar... Your watching family guy

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theres no 'I' in 'team' but theres an 'I' in 'hitler'

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the American family left the McDonald's with freshly bought chicken nuggets in their possession, and needed to cross the road to return to their home and eat said chicken.

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"Do you like pie?" "No." "Do you like blueberries?" "No." "I have something you won't like." "Is it a blueberry pie?" "No, I shagged your wife last night".

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Why couldnt the man buy food? Because.

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Q: What did the little jewish boy get for his birthday in 1940? A: The holocaust.

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what is the difference beyween football and baseball the superbowl and world series

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What has 2 wheels and looks like a bike? A bike.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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Why didn't Lucas want to go down the slide? He was scared.

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Q.A duck walks into a bar and asks for grapes.What is the duck asking for? A. Nothing... Ducks can't talk

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What did the oak tree say to the pine tree? Nothing tress dont speak regardless of the kind.

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Q: What would you think if a homeless person asked, "Spare change for drugs and cigarettes?" A: At least he was being honest.

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A duck walks into a bar Its theoretical comical universe implodes from the destructive weight of inevitable punchlines and everyone in the bar dies.

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five gay guys stand in a line is it a straight line

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Why did the kid get beaten up? -he was gay

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guess what? WHAT? Idk.

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I dont have a girlfriend

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How did Mary fall off the swing? She got hit by a fridge.

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Why did the welshman cross the road? To violently hump sheep.

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why did Susie cry? she got pecked in the face by a goose

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What did the orange say to the lemon? We are both alike but a differnt color

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Covert trance, black Ops, and something I kinda made up myself. The first two are basically using suggestions without the victim being aware of it, that is how that famous bank robber that just asks nicely for all the cash and gets it succeeds. The other is tricking the "allmighty" subconcious and again, my own invention people claim its called "this and that", I know, because I coined most of the terms. Anyway, you put people into a deep state of trance, you tell them to take a step forward into the sea, and well, you actually led them down the top of a skyscraper or something fun... "Now... Suck on the lollipop I have between my, okay ill stop"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops