What did the fat man order at McDonalds? Nothing, he was on a diet

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there were 5 brothers chasing it with a bat.

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Roses are red violets are blue tulips are purple/pink

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How many black people does it take to screw In a lightbulb.....I can't see them.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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What is invisible and smells like rabbits? Bunny farts.

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Birdie Birdie in the Sky, Left a message in my eye ... So I shot the little bitch

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What do you call a KKK member? ...racist

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The black man at the narcotics anonymous meeting said, "oh, this isn't bingo is it?" then walked out of the room feeling mildly embarassed.

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What did Oprah get for christmas? Weight Watchers

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Why was Timmy crying when he got home? His family was dead in a pile with a pitchfork going through each of their bodies

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Why was New Zealand attacked by Australia? New Zealand attacked Australia due to a teritorial dispute. The war lasted for 3 years with over 150000 deaths.

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Whats brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

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How do you learn how to drive? You get in the driver seat

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Why did the man lose the poker match in the jungle? He was playing a cheetah.

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What's worse than a burglar breaking into your house in the middle of the night? A rapist breaking into your house in the middle of the night.

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YOU KNOW WHO ELSE LOVED AND NURTURED ME THROUGH MY CHILDHOOD YEARS? MY MOM.

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Aodhans da is Mr.Bradly and he dosnt know what coordinates are, 180 anti-clockwise,he has "the key to examination success is revision and homestudy tattooed on his chest, his das herbert the pervert, his mas a taxcollector and on the dole, his da sits on the roof eating biscuits, cleaning the satilite dish, he gets his pubes shaved in gordans chemist, he uses mcdonaldsd wifi, hes a fruit fly and he can stop global warming by shaking his head!!!!!!!!

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what kind of pizzas did the twin tower executives order on 9-11? two large "planes"

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How do you make a penguin fly? You strap it to the roof of a plane.

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It's caoimhin I wasnt writing cos kane turned my computer off the bel end aodhans been tuping sayin its be the spa.

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What do you say when you accidently punch a wasps nest? Nothing.The correct choice is ton run as fast as you can to avoid getting stung by the entire nest of wasps.

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What's worse than sitting through a boring class? Sitting on a bus that a terrorist is about to blow up.

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Why did the black man jump off of a bridge? -He was in depression and comitted suicide.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops