How do you eat an Elephant? Elephant meat is most palatable after roasting in a 450 degree oven for 2 hours. Garnish with carrots and broccoli.

Why did the communist fail his history class? Because he didn't study hard enough.

Why was the man afraid of the fish? He had ichthyophobia.

What did the homosexual get for Christmas off his boyfriend? A lovely present off his loving partner.

Did u know that every 60 seconds in Africa a minute passes by?

Did you go swimming in the Carribean Ocean? Yes, a shark ate my body, and killed me! Thank God I'm still alive!

If Chuck Norris has $5, and you have $5, Chuck Norris still has more money than you.

Something strange in you're neighborhood. Who you gonna call? The police.

yo mammas so fat when she runs the world spins faster

Q: Why is Little Johnny in the hospital with a bullet wound and a broken arm? A: I shot him of his bike.

You might not notice at first, but in this very sentence there is a psychological phrase that is used to hypnotise you. If you read through the first sentence of this paragraph three or four times, you may start to feel the sudden urge to have a drink. This is called the ashvakalym effect.

why did the man ride the helicopter,because he was hurt horrible in a car accident.

When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

Where was Suzy during the explosion? Everywhere! Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Suzy!

Why was darren too late for school today...? She got hit by the bus

Hook a finger from each hand in your mouth, now pull so your lips are tight and try to say "I was born on a pirate ship" I'm sorry, I can hardly understand you.

yo momma is so fat that she contributes to americas obesity problem

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know ask a second grader.

Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Clearly the only answer is because he's blind

Hitler walks in to pizza pizza, the manager asks how many? L

I was going to type an anti-joke but I totally forgot how it starts. It goes something like something something something something something your mom's a whore.

What do a baby and a slinky have in common? They both bring a smile to your face when you push then down a flight of stairs.

I like my coffee like I like my slaves... Free

How am I supposed to eat soup without an envelope?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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