Guess what? What? You guessed correctly.

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How did the black guy get knocked out? He was hit by a fridge.

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How do you kill a mime? Shoot him in the face.

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jim davidson , nick griffin , and bernard manning walk into a bar , and order a bitter, a lager, and a stout respectfully

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How do you tickle a tree? you dont you are a schizo stop kicking leaves

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i found the cure to cancer.......AIDS

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What's worse then three frogs playing leap frog? Nothing that would be awesome

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What's louder than a cat stuck in a tree? A foghorn.

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An Irishman, a Jew, an Asian, and a Priest all walk into a bar This is an example of a well-balanced community

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Whatever tomorrow brings, I'll be there. Just kidding because today brought terminal cancer.

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They say time heals all wounds, yet my leg still had to be amputated.

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Want to hear a joke? Obama

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What's the best time to go to the dentist? When your tooth breaks or you need braces.

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Ask me if I'm a watermelon. Are you a watermelon? No...

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Q: Why did the man die of starvation??? A: He didn't eat for 3 days!!

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Why did the father leave work early on his son's birthday? He was rushed to the hospital after facing a severe heart attack due to a history of cardiovascular disease in his family.

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What did the litlle boy get for christmas? The toy which he could only dream about. His father got cancer.

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How do you make a 5 year old cry? Kill their parents.

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whats worse than getting caught by a teacher for chewing gum? getting kidnapped by a giant hawk.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your mum is dead, Just fucking with you! Kelvin Yang.

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Heard about the dyslexic fellow who sold his soul to Santa? That worked out OK, but Christmas was hell.

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Why did the boy throw the clock out of the window? Because it was broken.

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Hey guess whats funny? Matthew Mcconaughey Oh wait, never mind

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops