How do you fit an elephant inside your car?: Starve it to death, then chop it in pieces.

I DO NOT CARE ABOUT NOVA! MY NAME IS VIKTOR REZNOV! AND I WILL HAVE MY REVENGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

why did the black man drink grape kool-aid kool-aid refreshed him after a hard days work out in the field picking cotton

How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the fridge door and place the elephant inside. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the fridge door, remove the elephant, and place the giraffe inside. There is a party at the zoo. All of the zoo animals attend, except one. Which one? The giraffe, because he is in the fridge.

What did the chicken say when it layed the square egg? Ouch.

Whats black and white and red all over? A chopped up dalmation...

Why doesnt the chicken wear any pants? His pecker is on his head

Q. What's yellow and sour? A. Not a banana

if someone chucks skittles at u and says "taste the rainbow!!!!" chuck m&ms at them and say "Im not afraid!!!!!"

I took my father out last night. We went to the Olive Garden.

What's Black, white, green, and red? To bloody zebras fighting over a pickle

What happened when the Arabic man went through airport security? He was racially profiled and stopped, delaying not only him but the line of people behind him.

What do you get when you cross a Dachshund and a Nazi? Bestiality. Ew.

Why was the blonde so dumb? She had a severe case of dyslexia, which made it difficult to study.

j.p. is dumb

A man walks into a bar. He tricks a lady into smelling a rag doused with chlorophoam, and rapes her.

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I do not know because it depends on the woodchuck; however, if some statistical evidence is gathered on the average amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck you most likely would get a close answer, considering that the statistical research was not flawed.

A man walks into a bar and says, "Hey, Jim, your wife just died from terminal cancer." Jim then says, "Cool. Hey, do you know if the games on tonight?"

What did the fat man order at McDonalds? Nothing, he was on a diet

what did the duck say to the other duck Quack

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenic, and don't have any friends

Jack, John, Justin, Joseph and Jimmy walk into a bar. They order a pint of beer and start wondering what their names have in common.

Your mother is so fat that when she sits around the house she is likely to be there for some time.

Reading the Terms and Conditions

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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