There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

Roses are Red Violets are Purple But nothing rhymes with purple.

Abe Lincholn had a son, But he died

I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one . Though , I do have cancer .

Roses are red, Violets are blue, So what is the colour violet for?

What's black, white, and red all over?? A penguin that just got hit by a truck and is now struggling to live.

In soviet russia, child molests you! Unfortunately true

whats does a dog cat spider and rat have in common?the dog cat and rat are all mammals.Exept for the rat idiot!!you should have figured THAT out before!!!

Roses are red violets are blue, I more do like pink like the holes are in you.

A dirty joke Three white horse's are walking down a trail one falls in the mud

What's funnier than a jalapeño? A jalapeño on a stick.

Q: Why did Sally keep falling off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

A man walks into a woman's bedroom... But I was already bored of the plot so I skipped to the end of the pornographic video.

Q. Where did Little Timmy go for Christmas? A. Auschwitz

How do you get a drummer off your doorstep? Ask politely.

A man goes to the doctor and complains: "Doctor, my Viagra hasn't worn off! It's been over eight hours!" The doctor replies "You were bitten by a banana spider. You have one day to live.

"hey do you know the date" "58"

Three men are facing a firing squad. They are all promptly executed. Even if they were to escape by distracting the executioners, they would no doubt be shot down before they could get for.

Jennifer walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender's name was Steven. His friend's sister who was my cousin's ex wife has the same name as the girl Jennifer. That's what I heard.

A guy walks up to his boy and tells him, "Hey, if you don't stop masturbating you'll go blind." The boy says, "Who are you? Your not my father."

What's black and White and black and White? A nun falling down a stairs

My wife told me that I should see things from a woman's point of view. So I looked out the kitchen window.

._____________________. Whale!

- Knock Knock - Who is it ? - I'm a Jehovah witness - Sorry, I don't know anyone by the name of "a Jehovah witness". Bye.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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