A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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yo mama is so fat she has more rolls than basken robins does flavors

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How do you stop your golf ball from hitting a goose? You dont.

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Whats worse than a suicide bomber? Hubcaps

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a horse walks into a bar, hours later it walks out on two legs and the man who saw it all happen couldn't believe his eyes. The man then turns to the bartender and says, "I theenk eye've had enuf, Cut me hoff!"

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Roses are red Violets are blue Ebola is present And so are u

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How many cans does the average alcoholic drink in one night? None. Cans are solid and therefore cannot be drank.

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Today, I was thirsty so I got in my kitchen and took a bottle of juice out of my refrigirator, I realised the bottle was empty, so I immediatly took a walk to the store and bought another bottle.

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Why didn't the guy have kids? He didn't want them

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What is black and white and has 4 wheels? A zebra, I lied about the wheels

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Alister Darling plucks his eyebrows.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems make sense. 5

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why did billy fall on the sidewalk? he got stabbed

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yo momma's so dumb she attended a dyslexic test and was proven mildly autistic.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Max. Max who? Max who starts his greeting with,  "In accordance with Megan's law"  

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What do you call a Muslim on a plane? A passenger, you racist bastard.

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I'm colorblind.

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There were three elephants in a bathtub. One said, "Pass me the soap." The other one said, "What do you think I am? A Radio???"

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A midget goes up to a prostitute and asks "what’s the worst joke you ever heard?" She replies "probably this one

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What did the Shark attack victim say just before she died from her injuries? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, The first line is spelled wrong, Ha, I tricked you

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive a car? Because she was a woman.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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