a man walks into a bar.... his? drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

HEYEEYAHEYAYYAEEAHHAAA

a priest and a rabbi are walking down a road together the rabbi says: so your a priest how about that the priest says: fine ive read the bible a few times good book

Where does Elmo live? In Sesame Street.

What is black and blue and red all over? My wife.

my friend died in a car crash, now i have no friends.

Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar Was it you? No

a white guy walks into a black guy bar who walks out. A. half black half white baby.

A white man walked into a bar, and an indian walked into a totem pole...

AIDS

Whats funny about a guinea pig water skiing? The part where he explodes.

Kameron Brown is gay.

Q:How many pieces of paper can one tree make? A:Trees cannot make paper, people make paper from trees. So the answer is none, a tree can't make any paper whatsoever.

What did the kid with no arms and legs get for christmas? Cancer

Why did the little boy die? His mother got an abortion...

Mexican? I dont care if you are Mexican or not really, it makes no difference to me, I know you, I seen you before. But seriously, I consider you a good friend and all, and it seems we both get along, but you know after stuff happens, are we still friends then or is this all just a mating game thing for you? You can be honest with me, I am a realist, and I kinda like the idea of,the day after tomorrow, wont deny that. Its just that I dont want to lose a good friend in the process, and if this is just you trying to score, then well, I guess its still nice knowing this side of you.

God, you know after creating humanity and kinda regretting it and stuff, fell into drinking and betting. He found Sin a fellow poker player, and all was good. Until God, drinking a bit too much bet a bit too many of his creds: Son. Jesus: Yes father. God: Uh, I kinda ended up low on cash on the poker game last night and I kinda well... I am gonna be frank here, I bet you and lost. NeroMetal Not dissing the bible, just enjoying the always brighter side of life eh? ;)

Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

Why don't some black men have jobs? Because they won't work

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up? She had no legs.

Why did the chicken attempt to cross the road? To see if it could.

What do you say if you see a black man with blood on his hands and he has a mask on? Thank you doctor for saving my sons life!

Why couldn't Helen Keller Drive? Because she was a woman.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin, your mother has AIDS.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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