What happened to the soldier who go shot while fighting terrorists in the middle east? He died and had a proper funeral back in the town/city that he was born in.

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What happens when a black man is swinging in a tree? He is enjoying the swing set I helped his father put up.

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why was the man at the tuna fish factory mad? because he was going through intense emotional trauma happening in his life because of problems with his wife and child.

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Did you see Helen Keller at the movie theater? I didn't either, she's dead.

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Why did the man sit on the chair? Because he was tired of standing

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How do you stop a baby from crawling circles? You nail it's other hand to the floor too

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Why did Dracula cross the road? To get to the other unbitten virgin.

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CUT MY SOUL INTO PIECES MY NAME IS VOLDEMORT TERMINATION YOU'RE BLEEDING DON'T GIVE A F**K IF I HAVE NO NOSE FOR BREATHING

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How did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? "Robin, get in the Batmobile."

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A horse walks into a bar. It doesn't order anything or say anything because it is a horse. It proceeds to walk around and knock over a few tables before finding the door.

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Why did little jimmy fall of his bike? His grandma threw the refrigarator at him.

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Whats red and black and has 8 legs? 4 dead african babies.

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"bus driver pressed the horn at my mum and she stuck a finger up at him " Not the first time she's got the horn and shoved a finger up

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A man walked into a bar making it immediately apparent that he had no future in competitive limbo.

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What's the difference between a person and a cow? 2% of their DNA. The other 98% is virtually identical.

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Why did the man get in a car accident? Because he was blind.

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An elephant stomped on a mouse. What did the mouse say? Ouch.

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2 black people and a mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The black person because they decided it would save gas if they all carpooled to their job.

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Boy: Mother, I'm dying! Mother: Ha, lol, I put poison in your cheese! Boy: MOTHER! Boy: *dies*. Mother: Ha, lol!

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How did Goku save his home planet? He didn't.

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Why was little Jimmy so sad? Because he was H.I.V. positive

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knock knock who is there who who who your an owl

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How do you confuse a blonde? Ask her a very challenging question.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops