How do u get suzzy off a swing? You tell her to get off

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A: Why do you look like a dog? B: Idk.

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knock knock who's there ... '*Opens the door slowly* SUPRISE BUTT SEX!

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How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

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RECTUM? Damn near spelled "Wrecked Him" the wrong way!

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Why can't Timmy go on any rollercoasters? Because he's morbidly obese and it would a safety hazard.

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qu'est ce qui est petit et poilu? un asticot poilu

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A black man, a gay man, and an Asian woman are sitting at a bar. The black man gets a phone call, and after the call all three of them are excited because they are all friends and the black man just got into a good college.

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was struck by lightning and died.

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Why was the woman in the kitchen? Because she is enjoying the meal her husband has prepared for her after a long day at her second full-time job of the day

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A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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What's funnier than 1 anti- joke? Two anti- jokes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a car.

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Do you know what would happen if Hitler was still alive today. Nothing he's not.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, As you can tell...a lot of blood has been spilt today.

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Where do cows go in their free time? burger king.

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Q. What happened to the women who cut her finger? A. she got staff infection and died.

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What is brown and can't get an erection? Poo

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

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Why couldn't the turtle swim? Because he went too close to an oil spill, the petroleum got into his mouth and coated his lungs and he is now dead.

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What do you call two lesbians in a canoe? Women.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken had been running in the road's direction for some time, and continued travelling in that direction despite the road being in the way.

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What time is it in Florida? Time To Eat The President Of The United States!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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