You're mama's so stupid, she decided to go back to school and finish her degree in Russian Literature to improve her self-esteem and maybe -- just maybe -- save her marriage, which had been on the rocks, mostly due to her intolerable self-loathing.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? getting your ball sack ripped off with a grapple hook

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Why can't Hellen Keller have kids? Because she's dead, therefore does not possess the ability to bear children.

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Yo mama so short she often has to ask you to retrieve items from the top shelf of her cabinet.

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knock knock whos there boo boo who? stop crying its only me! its not you, my mom has cancer, my dad was killed in a car accident, my pregnant wife has been murdered, and my uncle touches me.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Don't matter what you call him he ain't gonna come.

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What's bigger than a moose? An even bigger moose.

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How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit it with an axe!

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When life gives you cancer, make cancer-aids.

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Was the worlds most expensive comedian any fun? Well, he was funny, but they where all cheap laughs. Moral: Expensive jokes are expensive.

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Have you heard the one about the blonde and the bear? No. Me neither.

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what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

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What's wheels and has green? Lied, I grassed about the wheels.

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Man: Why do you wear your wedding ring on the wrong finger? Woman: Oh, wow, thanks for pointing that out. Silly me.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1, but if the ladder is shaky, you might need another to hold it up.

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How did the girl cross the road? -She didn't, she died because she was blind and didn't see the "don't walk" sign.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a semi.

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A fat black guy walks into a pet store and asks if he can have a chicken. The cashier says "what do you want a chicken for?" He says " I need to lose weight so I'm hoping to eat its all natural eggs" So the cashier gives him the chicken and the fat black guy lost 50 pounds.

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Why did Tim fall out of the window? Well... he didn't exactly fall... I pushed him

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A man walks into a bar. Something funny happens.

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What was Hellen Keller's favorite color? Velcro.

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What did the black man buy at the store? Nothing he has no money

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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What do u do when u hear about a smart Blonde. Cant think of anything? Exactly

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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