What's worse than finding a worm on your apple? Trench foot on your eyebrow.

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What's the difference between a sewer pipe and a French fry? A lot

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Your momma's so not fat that when a school bus rolled by here house, she just sat there and turned on oprah.

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A dimetrodon, a pterosaur and a chicken walk into a bar. As they enter, the bartender says "Hold it! We are not licensed to serve dinosaurs." "I am not a dinosaur," said the dimetrodon. "Neither am I," said the pterosaur. "But I am," said the chicken. So the dimetrodon and the pterosaur enjoyed a cold beer each, but the chicken had to wait outside.

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A man is eating in a restaurant and says, "Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!" The waiter says, "I'm sorry, can I bring you some salad instead?"

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roses are red... violets are blue ..... Cancer

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What does the ship say when it's cold? Shiver me timbers

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Why did the donkey say "Shit sorry I had no idea" Because the batteries shouted: "Nobody told me about your actions here, sorry for the terrible coding format, I am new"

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Your mom is so ugly and stupid that people make fun of her and that's not nice.

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Knock Knock: I have full blown AIDS

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What happened when the Asian girl got a B on her report card? She committed suicide

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women are like buddhist shrines, you don't piss on them

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What is a holocaust survivors favorite food nothing

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While getting Sherrie's Crabcakes I was arrested by Missy Hepp highway patrol.

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A grandma starts pinching her grandsons cheeks and saying who's a little cutie pie the baby begins to bleed cause his grandmas nails are peircing his skin

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How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? Well none today because today is Saturday... maybe tomorrow

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Why was the girl so stupid? She had mental retardation caused my Down Syndrome.

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Q: Knock, Knock A: To get to the other side.

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Why did the head football coach go to the bank? Not to get his quarter back cause that'll cost him at least ten million a year.

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my ilkshake brings all the boys in the yard. and the local health inspector's like , have you got a permit to be selling dairy beverages from a home based business?

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A priest a rabbi and the dalai lama walk into a bar. They decided to order the hotwings...... Why do u care??? : )

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Why did the man walk into the grocery store? Because he had run out of peanut butter

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Did you hear about the Australian man who was jumped by a gang of Americans with knifes? He had his cash and possessions stolen from him, and had to spend two weeks in hospital due to stab wounds.

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Q: How many electricians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: 1, idiot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops