My name's Forrest Gump. People call me Forrest Gump.

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Your mom is so fat because she eats too much and is most likely incapable of controlling when to stop.

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Q: What's big, green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A: A pool table.

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If a tree falls in the forest, but nothing is there to hear it, does it still make noise ? Yes, because whether the action of the three falling produces sound waves or not is not dependent on whether something is there to receive these waves.

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Have you heard of the dog that sounds like Megan fox? No Oh, well ummm apperantally there's this ummm dog that sounds like Megan fox. So ummm yeah. Pretty interesting stuff

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OMG my mom just let me go to a concert in feb 31,2012 wohoo! LOL

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They then proceed to bake into tasty pastries which are then eaten for snacks or maybe a light breakfast.

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Q.Why did Bruno Mars marry the blond? A.Because it was a beautiful night and he was looking for something DUMB to do.

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Whats really ugly and horny Jake's mom

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Do you know what a zombie smells like? Death

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A man walks into a bar and orders two shots the bartender then picks up his shotgun and gives it to him

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Have you seen the newest starwars? What movie? I mean that episode where stars fight... Will Smith vs Keanu Reeves? I am talking about the stars in the sky firing at each other! You know, those star pilots on planes... Flown by Will Smith and Keanu Reeves? BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! (You heard that one in your head)

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Why did Princess Diana cross the road? She wasn't wearing a seat belt.

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Whats worse than spilling the milk? Getting raped by the easter bunny.

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What do you call a person without any arm no legs and a eye patch? names

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? This year I'm going to win the golden brief case!

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Why did Johnny close the door on Sally's face? Because Johnny is a dick.

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knock, knock! who's there? i don't know i don't know who niether do i...

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hi

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How does an Asian person get overweight? By eating food with a great amount of calories and not burning then off in time.

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Knock Knock! Who's There? Tourettes Kid. Touret- FUCK SHIT!

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a bmw? I don't have a bmw in my garage.

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What happened after the man with no arms and legs lost his keys? Nothing. He won't get them for the rest of his life.

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What's worse than requesting a three-some to your in-laws? Forgetting to suggest that they me too fragile and disabled, resulting in one of their limbs breaking.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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