Whats the difference between a jew and firewood? Firewood is meant to be burned in a stove or firepit while jews are functioning members of society.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the the man, the dog, and the psychiatrist talk about? The man's childhood experience losing his pet as a contributer to his symptoms of psychosis.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Wife, "Wake up... i think there's someone in the house, do something... go downstairs and have a look!" Husband, "Do it yourself." Wife, "You what? You can't expect a woman to fight off an intruder..." Husband, "You women wanted equal rights so here you go, do it yourself."

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's worse than being caught in a downpour? Having your kneecaps ripped out of their sockets.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's worse than a papercut? why do you insist on asking me these questions?

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A black guy and a jew walk into a country club, within minutes, they are told to leave and never come back in order to avoid being contaminated by the radioactive waste left by a landfill company cutting corners in safety regulations

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did Stephen Hawking say after he scaled Mount Everest? Yay!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A man went skydiving and tragically died.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A: Where does a cow go on the weekends? B: To the mooooovies? A: No, to the slaughterhouse.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he needed to go home.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what is red and smells like paint red paint

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's worse than failing an exam? Failing two exams.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why did haris die...............................................his hair blond? .. u

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the woman go in a elevator with Ray Rice? Because they were both going to the 25th floor and stairs would take too long.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you call a deer with no eyes? extremely unfortunate...

thumb_up thumb_down -4

In Soviet Russia you don't drive car, because the Soviet Union was disbanded in 1991

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How can you get a handicap black man to walk again? You don't...... Unless you motivate him with fried chicken. Anti-anti-joke!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Scratch and Sniff [________] smells like glass doesn't it?

thumb_up thumb_down -4

69

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why is 6 afraid of 7.? Well 7 has suffered a tramatic brain injury, and has a tendancy to brutally attack anyone he comes in contact with. The whole situation is unfortunate.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

The President walks into a local pub. Everyone shits their fricken pants because the President is here.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Roses are red violets are blue I fucked your mom now im about to fuck you to.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops